Colin's camera
by Anrheithwyr
Summary: Alaska was a promise that Dennis had heard countless times before from his brother, one name on a long list of places that Colin wanted to visit one day, before he died or grew too old to travel or became too bitter to appreciate the smaller things in life.


_i.1991_

Alaska was a promise that Dennis had heard countless times before from his brother, one name on a long list of places that Colin wanted to visit one day, before he died or grew too old to travel or became too bitter to appreciate the smaller things in life.

Colin would repeat the list in his sleep to the point where Dennis himself could recite it from memory; _Alaska, Zimbabwe, Japan, Mount Everest, the Marianas Trench_…the list went on and on, more than four dozen cities or countries or just interesting places to visit.

The smooth, sweet tones of his brother's voice, stating off his list each night as they lay in bed, had always helped lull Dennis into a calm sleep, his eyes fluttering and his breath slowing until he, too, had fallen into dreams full of long trips across the world.

Dennis loved the sound of his brother's voice, loved his brother, in the way that a small animal feels love for their owner; he had spent much of his life trailing after Colin, watching the older boy document the world around them with the use of his camera.

Dennis loved his brother more than anything else in the world, and it was obvious that Colin loved him as well, but what really connected the two boys was Colin's camera. It had been a birthday present…years ago, given to Colin through the combined efforts of both of their parent's pay checks, because, of course, a family of four could not live off of the salary of just a milkman.

Colin had been so happy to see that camera the morning of his tenth birthday, carefully wrapped up in paper that was originally from Christmas, tearing into his present (the only one that year, Mrs. Creevey had explained in a voice that almost cracked) and letting out a shout when he saw what it was that Colin had received.

"Den, look this way! Smile!" Colin had yelled when he finally figured out how to work all the buttons, and Dennis had obliged happily, giving his brother the biggest grin he could muster, letting Colin snap a few photos before grumbling about being late for the bus.

It hadn't been long after, Dennis noticed, that Colin started reciting the list of places he wanted to go, at first writing them down every time he thought of a new place that he considered visiting. The first few names were just cities or whole countries that Colin saw on the side of buildings, but soon enough, Colin had entire plans written out for what he wanted to do on his journeys.

"Look, Den, this is where I want to go," Colin said, early one Saturday, dropping onto the couch next to Dennis, who had been watching cartoons and eating Coco Pops with what remained of the milk. Colin held up a picture of a large, icy mountainside overlooking water clearer than what could be found coming from the sink.

"What's that? Which one is that?" Dennis asked, wrinkling up his nose as he looked down at the photo in curiosity. The mountain was unfamiliar to him, not one of the pictures that his older brother had shown him before. "It looks so…so _big_."

Was big the right word? It didn't feel right to Dennis, brow furrowing as he tried to think of a proper word to describe just how_ amazingly _fantastic the picture looked to Dennis, but all he could think of was big, which wasn't a very good word for describing something.

"Is it Mt. Everest? Is that a new one of Mt. Everest? I haven't seen it before, where'd you get _that _picture?" Dennis asked, leaning in closer to his brother, shoulder resting on Colin's left arm as he stared down at the picture of still water and icy rocks. "Is there a lake at Mt. Everest?"

"It's Alaska, Den, that's why there's water and trees…see, right there, you can just barely see them at the bottom of the lake, running along the edge," Colin whispered, pointing out a few smudges of green that were ringing the water. "I've put it on my list, you know," Colin said, shifting off of the couch so that Dennis fell backwards. "Alaska, I mean. I want to visit…I want to see _all _of it."

"Why?" Dennis asked, honestly interested, because whenever Colin talked with that far away glance of his, Dennis could see the world in the same way that his brother did, observing the world, however briefly, in the same manner that Colin saw it all.

"It's pretty, that's why," Colin replied, folding the picture in half before pulling out his notebook, sliding the paper between two pages, giving his younger brother a grin. "I want to take a hundred photos of just about _everything _while I'm there, you know? So that I never forget how _beautiful _it all is. I think that's why I take photos, honestly, so I don't forget stuff…so I can see beautiful stuff long after I've left it behind."

"Colin?" called their mother from the backyard, where she was covered in dirt and sweat, surrounded by dozens of recently planted tomato plants, hunched over a large pile of plastic cartons that had once carried the tomatoes. "Can you come out here and help me with these cartons, please?"

"Coming, Mum!" Colin yelled back, getting to his feet, setting the notebook down on the couch next to Dennis. Colin turned to his little brother, giving him another half-smile. "Enjoy your cartoons, okay, Den? I've got to go help Mum now, so you just stay here, alright? Don't run off to Alaska without me, or something silly like that. After all, who would take all the pictures for you if I wasn't along?"

"I'd take 'em myself," Dennis declared, but Colin only laughed, heading outside to help their mother. Dennis turned back to his television show, thinking about Alaska and how much time it would take to get there. He didn't even notice that Colin hadn't answered his question about where he had gotten the photo in the first place.

_ii.1998_

Dennis hadn't wanted Colin to leave him behind at the house with their parents; he hadn't wanted Colin to leave in the first place, but there wasn't a lot that could be done about Colin when he became determined, and Nigel's letter about Hogwarts' being in danger was more than enough to get Colin to his feet, wand in hand.

"I could help, Colin," Dennis had said, tugging at his brother's sleeve, but Colin had only shaken his head, looking out at the backyard angrily, eyes landing on their mother's long-ago abandoned tomato garden before coming to rest on Dennis once more. "I could fight _with _you _and _Nigel! Please, let me help, Colin, I know I can do it!"

"No, Den, you can't come along with me!" Colin had replied in a low tone, voice nearly turning into a growl as he took another step outside, giving his brother a harsh look. "You heard Nigel's message as well as I did, Dennis. They're not letting in anyone underage, and I'm sure as hell not letting you run straight into the middle of a battle where you might get hurt or…or die…"

"_You're _underage, still," Dennis had pointed out, to which Colin only wrinkled his nose, mumbling something about being less than a month away from his birthday before giving his brother one last shove, shutting the door behind him before Disapparating from the backyard, his disappearance followed by the sound of a loud cracking.

That had been two days ago, and Dennis had yet to hear from his brother since. Mum said that Dennis was only being impatient and that Colin would return when he could, but Dennis knew better than she just how dangerous people like the Death Eaters could be.

She didn't understand the fear that fluttered in a Muggleborn's heart at the sight of those dark, flapping robes or their cold, emotionless masks that twisted into such cruel smiles. Mum didn't understand the terror of being at the receiving end of nasty curses and _Avada Kedavra_s. She didn't know that the Wizarding World was not a kind place for people like Colin and Dennis.

Two long, seemingly endless days started and ended without a word from Colin, which made Dennis very fretful. It wasn't like his older brother to go very long without any sort of contact, whether it be a quick letter or even just the fluttering of his owl's wings to let them know he was safe. Each hour that passed, each chime of his parent's clock, made Dennis jump in fright as he imagined the worst possible outcomes for his older brother.

Was Colin dead? Was he taken prisoner by the Death Eaters, or had he possibly become one of their many next victims, one in a long list of unfortunate Muggleborns who they had tortured and broken? Had the battle been lost, his brother's body burnt or discarded like nothing more than trash on the side of the road?

It wasn't until the early hours of May 5th had begun that Dennis was awakened by a knock on the front door. Scrambling from his bed, Dennis rushed downstairs, praying for the best but at the same time trying to steel himself for the worst. Was it Colin that he was going to see at the front door, or an aging representative who didn't even know who Colin was?

The person at the door was neither Dennis noted when he flung the door open, taking in the long, blonde hair and warm brown eyes of his fellow classmate, Natalie McDonald, who nearly jumped back at the sight of Dennis. His chest was heaving up and down, his face no doubt wild with anticipation before quickly slumping into disappointment at the realisation that his brother was not home. They had sent a fifteen year girl in Colin's place.

"Hello, Dennis," Natalie said, eyes widening with shock as Dennis stepped back into the house a bit, giving the girl a slightly suspicious look. Despite being in the same year and even the same house, Dennis knew very little about Natalie McDonald except that she was apparently really sick rather often. "It's been a while since I last saw you."

"Where's Colin?" Dennis replied, taking in the way that Natalie's face fell, her eyes dropping down the ground, and he knew. He knew that the worst possibility had happened… "No…no, no, that's not fair. That's not fair, you're lying! You're lying to me! _No! He's not dead, he's not!_"

"I'm really sorry, Dennis, really, really sorry. I was the last person he saw…he said I had to say good-bye to you, since he wouldn't be able to…I really didn't want to, that's what I told him, that I didn't want to have to say good-bye to you for him, but he said I _had _to. He said…" Natalie was avoiding Dennis' eyes as she spoke, "he said to '_tell Den not to break my camera when he's travelling_'."

"No!" Dennis yelled, slamming the door and stomping off into the house, leaving Natalie to stand outside awkwardly, unsure what to do. "_NO!_" Dennis continued to yell as he stomped back to the front door, throwing it back open, breathing heavily. "_It's not fucking fair!_"

"I'm really sorry, Dennis, honestly, please don't get angry. _Please_, I'm only here to help, I just am doing what your brother told me to do-"

"You're not _supposed _to end up dead, you bastard!" Dennis yelled while kicking his mother's flower bushes in anger, tears burning the reddened skin of his cheeks as Natalie backed up away from his with a wary glance. "_I fucking hate you, you asshole! How could you_…how could you just _leave_ me, Colin? How could you just _do _that?"

"Dennis?" Natalie asked quietly, giving him a concerned look as he continued to rage around the front yard. "I'm also supposed to give you this, just so you know." She handed him a camera, the one that Colin never, _ever _let go of, no matter what. "Colin said it's yours now, if you want it."

Something inside of Dennis had died, leaving him empty and hollow, only able to stare down at the camera in Natalie's hands, blankly wondering to himself why Colin was giving _Dennis _of all people his camera, when he absolutely _loathed _lending it off to anyone else. Colin would be mad if he came back and found Dennis had used his camera.

_iii.1994_

"And I'm going to the same school as you, right? The school for magic? What's it called, Hogwash?" Dennis asked, staring down at the letter in his hands with a feeling of pure glee bubbling up inside of him, imagining being able to learn magic right alongside his older brother.

"Hogwarts, actually," Colin replied, setting his own letter down on the breakfast table and continuing to eat his French toast. "You'll be a first year and I'll be a third year, so we won't sleep in the same place, but I'll only be two floors above you, if something happens, and we'll be able to have most of our meals at the same time."

"Wow," Dennis breathed, continuing to scan through the letter, fingers buzzing as though he could just _feel _the centuries of magic rippling through this one piece of parchment. "Are there a lot of people like us? People whose _parents _aren't magic? You called them something….?"

"Muggleborns is the polite way of saying it, though of course, there are always some rude people who might call you _Mudblood _just to get a reaction out of you. Trust me, it's not worth it to let that sort of thing bother you. People who call you names because of you are just aren't worth it," Colin explained as Dennis continued to stare down at his letter in awe.

"_Dear Mr. Creevey_," he read aloud, closing his eyes as he imagined some aging witch or wizard hunched over the paper as they wrote out the words that were changing his whole entire life. "_We are pleased to inform you that you have a place at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. _Wow…"

"Don't go getting a big head, now, Den, it's the same sort of letter they send to every student, remember? Mine said the exact same thing when Professor McGonagall-you know, that older lady in the emerald robes with the stern face-came by to deliver _my _letter and explain Hogwarts to me," Colin said as Dennis held the letter tightly, causing small wrinkles in the parchment.

"I'm so _excited_, Colin! Can you imagine it, you and me, running around the greatest school in all of Britain, learning how to cast spells and be great wizards? Wow, I'm just…this is _amazing_," Dennis said, letting out a small sigh as he closed his eyes in thought.

"Hey, hold your letter up really quickly for me, Den, I want to get a picture of it, in case you lose the real thing at some point," Colin said, stretching his arm across the table for his camera, holding it up to look straight at Dennis' childish gap-toothed grin as the eleven year complied with his older brother's demands, letter in his hands.

"Like this, Colin?" Dennis asked, shifting slightly so that the previously crisp parchment rested just under his chin, still crumpling slightly at the edges from the force of his fingertips gripping the paper tightly. Dennis could only smile widely as his brother took his picture several times; all that the eleven year old thought of was exciting Hogwarts would be when he finally got to go in September.

"Just keep in mind that you might not end up in the same house as me, Den," Colin said as he gingerly set his camera down and continued to eat his breakfast. "_I'm _in Gryffindor, but you might end up in one of the other three houses instead. Don't feel bad if you _do _end up in a different house, though, because you'll still have a good time and make plenty of friends."

"I hope I _am _in Gryffindor, though," Dennis replied as a whirring noise began outside, causing both young boys to look up in excitement. "Is it seven-thirty already?" Dennis asked, looking over at the kitchen clock, listening intently for the sound of their dad's truck pulling in. "Dad's _home!_"

They rushed from their chairs, Dennis making sure to grab his letter from Hogwarts, and hurried to stand by the front door in expectation. Their dad left far too early every morning for them to say good-bye, but he was always back before the time came for the Creevey brothers to head off to the local summer camp, and even when he _was _late, Colin and Dennis didn't mind waiting around a little while in order to say hello to their dad.

"Dad, Dad, just _look_ what came in the mail today!" Dennis yelled as his father stepped in, the boys rushing their father excitedly. Mr. Creevey looked down at his sons with a smile, letting Dennis hand him the letter and reading it while Dennis continued to chatter with joy.

"_Dear Mr. Creevey_…" Peter Creevey read quietly before meeting his younger son's gaze, eyes sparkling with realisation and happiness. "You've been accepted? You've been _accepted_?" Dennis nodded, jumping up and down. "That's _amazing_, Dennis! I've got _two _wizards for sons, two! Wow! Dennis, this is fantastic! I'm so happy for you!"

"I'm gonna be a wizard, just like Colin!" Dennis yelled, taking the parchment back from his father, running down the hallway back to the kitchen in search of his mother. "I'm gonna be the _best _wizard in the whole world, yay! I'm going to Hogwarts, I'm going to Hogwarts! I'm a wizard, yay, look at me! Greatest wizard ever! I'm the best wizard ever!"

_iv.2003_

"We named him after you, Colin," Dennis said, letting his hand brush over the stone grave marker, feeling something hollow drop into the pit of his stomach. He had always loved his brother so much, the sweet, kind older boy who had never had a rude word to say. And now, Colin was dead, a sixteen year old only a few weeks from his seventeenth birthday.

"We named him after you," Dennis said again, swiping at the tears that threatened to spill out over his brother's grave as he spoke. "Colin Peter Creevey, after you and after Dad, since…I dunno if you know or not, but Dad had a heart attack last December and…there wasn't a whole lot anyone could do, I guess. They found him in his milk truck, you know, the engine running…"

Dennis looked away for a second, burrowing his head under his jacket, letting out a few small sobs, trying to keep it together as he remembered his father's funeral, the way everyone had been so quiet and apologetic to Dennis and his mother the entire time, like speaking too much might cause the Creeveys to fall apart like glass that had been smashed into pieces.

"It's weird, you know, because he was only forty-eight. I mean, isn't that a little young to be dying of something like heart problems? And Dad never drank or smoked or anything…you know how he was, Colin, how carefully he treated himself because his own father had all those heart complications?" Dennis let out a sigh, rubbing one hand over his face. "But, yeah…it's just _weird_, without Dad or you around and all these new things happening to me…"

A breeze made its way past just then, causing Dennis to have to pull his collar up around his neck and throat, though he didn't seem to mind or even really notice that the sky was darkening with potential rain clouds threatening to close in over him and flood out the graveyard.

"Natalie and I got married last September…Natalie McDonald, remember her? The quiet girl in my year who was always really sickly looking? We'd been going out for a while anyway when I realised that she was the one for me and…_I fell in love_, Colin, I fell in love so hard and it was almost kind of ridiculous. We've been married for a year now, ever since the 2nd, but it's because of the baby that I'm here right now," Dennis let out another heavy breath.

He still remembered falling into Natalie's arms, grief-stricken at the news that his brother was gone forever, taken from Dennis by some stranger who didn't understand how great and amazing his brother had been, taken from Dennis by someone who didn't know how much Dennis loved his brother, how he loved Colin more than nearly anything else.

Natalie had offered to stay by his side and comfort Dennis, and later on, to help break the news to Dennis' parents and help console _them_ as well. Natalie had insisted on assisting the Creeveys, going back to Hogwarts with Dennis to retrieve his brother's body as well as sticking by his side through the whole funeral and even convincing Dennis that it was in his best interest to return to Hogwarts that September and finish out his fourth through seventh years.

"And now…now we've got a little boy named Colin, who was born on September 18th, 2003, in case you aren't really sure on the dates wherever it is that you are. I swear, I let Natalie name him, but she insisted there wasn't another name that would fit our son except for Colin. She didn't know you very well, Natalie said, but everything she's ever heard from me proves that the only name that was worthy of our firstborn was yours," Dennis mumbled, letting his head rest on the gravestone.

He could have sworn that he almost heard the wind laugh, like someone else was here with him, but there was no one else in the graveyard right then, not when it was late September and looking ready to rain at any moment. Was it possible that Colin was there, sitting on the ground next to Dennis as the twenty year old spoke about his newly born son?

"They're both okay, Colin, don't worry about anything. Natalie and Colin are at St. Mungo's until tomorrow morning and then they'll be home and I'll have to get used to being a dad full-time. It's really weird…we hadn't expected to have a baby so soon. We've only been married for a year and we're both only twenty, but…I love him already. I love my little boy, Colin. I love his little face and the way he sighs in his sleep and how he's only fourteen hours old but he already seems to know who I am."

"I've still got your camera, you know, Colin. It works fine and we use it a lot, for our trips. I know you wanted to travel the world with me, Colin, and I guess this is the closest we'll ever get to that now, yeah?" Dennis continued to pull out photographs, setting them down.

"I guess this is how I'll remember you by, Colin," Dennis said quietly as he stood up and looked down at the pictures that he had charmed to the grave. "I'm trying to help…to…to keep us together. I…I really miss you, Colin, and it's just not…not fair…but I'm getting better now, and I'll be back, but right now, it's good-bye."

He left behind the pictures of Alaska and Mt. Everest, of a large pond full of koi fish, and of Dennis bent on one knee while proposing to Natalie. Pictures of trains speeding by and a group of friendly men on motorbikes, and a picture of a monkey reaching out with a banana.

The photo resting just above his brother's name was that of a newly born baby reaching upwards with tiny little fists, propped in Dennis' arms.


End file.
